Vom naus Heira / On Marrying Outside the Faith (1862)

Nearly all identified authors of Pennsylvania Dutch texts in the nineteenth century were nonsectarians (non-Amish or -Mennonites). One exception was John H. Oberholtzer (1809–1895), who is an important figure in the history of the Mennonite church in America. Among Oberholtzer’s achievements was founding the first Mennonite newspaper in North America, Der Religiöse Beobachter (The Religious Observer), in 1852. Der Religiöse Beobachter ceased publication in 1855, but was succeeded in 1856 by Das Christliche Volks-Blatt (The Christian People’s Paper). The language of Oberholtzer’s newspapers was German, though he did include a few pieces in his native Pennsylvania Dutch, one of which is below. Titled “Vom naus Heira” (On Marrying Outside the Faith), this article, which appeared in Das Christliche Volksblatt on April 2, 1862, with an introduction in German, expresses Oberholtzer’s concern about the tendency among some of his coreligionists at the time to seek spouses across confessional lines and how the Mennonite church dealt with such situations.

Das folgende ist zum Einrücken mitgetheilt worden im Namen eines alten “Pennsylvaniers,” und wir hoffen, so plump und einfach pennsylvanisch er auch geschrieben hat, werden’s unsere Leser doch nicht übel aufnehmen, da er gewiß Punkte in seiner Mittheilung hat, die nicht von geringer Tragweite sind, wenn man mit gesunder Vernunft darüber nachdenkt. Jetzt kommt sein Stück:

Vom naus Heira

Den Morja hab ich so über allerhand no gekonsidert und bin so an das naus heira kumma, und do hab ich gedenkt und gedenkt und hab des efeltig Ding schier gar nimme los werra kenna. Und weil ich’s Volksblatt als les, und sie als über allerlei Sache geschriwa, so hab ich gedenkt: du gehst just so gut a mol dra und schreibst e Stück for’s Volksblatt, grad wegen dem aus der Kmeschaft naus heira.

Ich wehs wol net wie mers geht weil das Volksblatt so viel dickköpfige Leser hot, und browira klei als wieder alles rum zu dreha. Ich hab a schun von annara Schreiwer kört, die ksat hen sie wota gern Schreiwa fars Volksblat aber sie wera bang, es det wider epper ebbes dagega schreiwa, und des deta sie so hassa. Doch ich men sel wer just Hochmuth sie wollo nix leida und deswega kumma sie net raus mit der Farb. Ich hab mir awer nau vorgenumma über Stock und Ste drufnei zu stolpara es mag mir geh wie’s will—tod derfa sie mich doch net macha, sonst krickt die la sie am Hals—ich mach’s just wie emol en wan es kmacht hot, wan ich angepackt wer und kann mich nimme verteidiga dan halt ich just grad’s maul und bin still.

Wegem naus heira hab ich kment wollt ich schreiwa. Ich kann net versteh daß sell ganz recht ist. Ich hab mol klesa im a dicka Buch das ener “Büchner” kschriwa hot, der ment sie sollten, wo möglich enerle Religion sein; aber guck just a mol des geheier in der Welt a. es wert ja nimme uf Vater und Mutter, nimme uf Freund oder Bekannter und bei viel am allerwenigsta uf Religion geguckt, wans numma keiert ist. freilich uf reich und sche gukt alt und jung. die ältera saga als zu ihra Kinner selli dort sin reich un ich denk sie sin a schmert und verstehns Geldmacha, selli det ich heira wan ich euch wer. do kommt es awer nau a noch druf a ob er oder sie scheh is. nau wann des beinanner ist, dann hen sie’s geriß als wenn sie die letzta in der Welt wera und Gott und Religion wird ganz hinta dra gestellt. Es wer ke wunner wan die prediger dem jungen Volk un den alten die Brügel um den Kop rum schmeisa deta daß es klingla det, wegen dem dumma geheier. farwas kan der Manist net a manista medel heira? der Reformirt a reformirt medel? der lutherisch a lutherisch medel? un so fort, sel det dano doch a ebbes gleich gucka wann sie mitenanner nach der kerch fahra deta. Awer gell ihr prediger, a del fun eurem junga folk will euch selbst net folga. und nau saga ihr nimme gern viel derwega, und bei dem wirds als wie lenger wie erger. Ich zweivel wol gar net dra daß ihr es gewis lieber sehen deta wenn eure Kinner in eure Kmeschaft heira awer de Ding is nau schun so lang im gang daß es a ferchterbarliche Revoluschen gewa wird wamer es stoppa wollt. und doch ist des ding die ganz Zeit net viel nutz. dan es mag schir so gut geh als es will, wann der Man oder die fra es bissel scharf uf ihra Kircha gucka dann gebt es gern dischputat in der Haushalting und der “alt” ist a gleich bei der Heck und sagt es da Kinner: ihr wert nau besser gar nix wenigstens mol net bis ihr keiert het, dano kennt ihr ja noch werra was ihr wollt. un so geht es jo anfangs oft. ja manchmol wan’s suntag wert dan geht der Man den Berk nuf in sei kerg und die fra nunner ins Dal in ihr kerg, des guckt awer dno net das wan die zwe eh flesch wera wie mei alt buch sägt. wie kann dan die helft den berk nuf und die anner helft den berk nunner geh zu enera Zeit; un die kinner bleiwa dan dahem und springa im dreck rum bis die alta wieder hem kumma, dano mus glei kscholta werra und die predigt hat am end kens ke drei sent gebat. Ich bin wol dum aber doch men ich do wer alles hinterfeterst. Es geht a nie lang so, dno bleiwe sie alle zwe aus der kerg un dahem oder lafa im suntag sunst rum ens da un sanner dort und die ganz familie is far die kerg verlora. des is m alta Herri sei Werk wie er sie fangt. werra sie alle zwe, die alta bei enara kerg un deta enanner ufmuntera mit einanner in 1 kerg zu geh, und deta die kinner an der Hand nemma un sie mit fiera sel det kwis besser gucka.

Ich habs a wol schun ksena das e del junga leit so steh bleiba und werra nix bis sie enig ergets sunst eber kfuna hen der oder die ihna akstanna hot, und wann sie sel keiert kat hen dann sin sie dno a so warrawi sel annar war. es mahk a gut knunk sei wann sie kwis aus der woret überzeikt sin daß selli kerg äh richtige Lehr hot; awer ich glab daß ens oft just dem annara zum kfalla dort dno higeht so daß sie doch a ebbes sin un is ihna schunst um die grundsetse ewaviel weil sie mena swehr jo ens just so gut wie’s anner. Well s mag sei das es verleicht a gut gnunk wär wann sie die grundsetza recht versteh deta, awer ich mehn wans just grad so owa drüwerawek is dan genkt es net aus dem klawa und des wehr a nix nutz, weil mein alt Buch sägt, was net aus dem klawa geht wär sünde. Röm. 14, 23.

Nau wann ich so rum guck dann fin ich diese lumperei nergets greser das wie grad uner uns manista, net überall aber doch an viel pletz, un des war schun so setter das es mir gedenkt. Die alta hen freilich als, un dun es a noch an viel pletz, wan ens naus heiert es naus schmeisa. awer sel hat a net viel kebat. Viel fun den jungen sin dno nimme Glieder warra, un sin a ihr lewalang so steh bliwa, sie hesa wol a doch manista awer sie sin nix sie gelten nirgends nix in der kerg. anara just dno glieder wara wann sie hen heira wolle, un des ist meiner mening no a nix.

An anara bletz hen sie des naus schmeisa ufgewa wan ens naus heiert, un del bat a net viel des wu a Glied do war doch viel Zeit mit dem andern fort in sei kerg geht und die kinner all mit. Nau die Schuld meiner mening no liegt da drin, weil wir es net erlawa daß des anner wu ke Glied bei uns is net mit uns zum nachtmol geh derf, weil wir mena der Man soll hie un die Frau dort zum nachtmol geh. das reißt unsere Glieder wek weil man und fra gern minanner zum nachtmol geh wolla, un ich wehs a net recht wie sel ding is, daß man zwe 1 flesch werra lasse im heira un dno, wann sie 1 Flesch warra sin, sie beim nachtmol geh, wider funnanner dut. mei meining is soige leut die mer zamma heira lossa wolla, die mechta a minanner bei uns zum nachtmol geh, wammer schunst nix schlimmes gega sie saga kennt. Die annara wu net zama keiert sin menig währ en anner ding. Ich glab daß die wu zamma heira, sotta ganz zamma oder gar net.

Nau ihr Drucker dut mei Stick grad so in die Zeitung wie’s is. wem’s net astet mag dagega schreiwa, net hina rum dagega schwetza. mei Nama gebt net bis ich sahk, un hes mich allaweil just en … Pennsylfanier.

The following was submitted for publication in the name of an old “Pennsylvanian,” and we hope, however coarse and simply Pennsylvanian he may have written, our readers will not be offended, since he certainly has points in his message that are of no little relevance if one reflects on them with a healthy dose of common sense. Here is his piece:

On Marrying Outside the Faith

This morning was I was reflecting on a number of things and so got to thinking about this marrying outside the faith. I thought and thought about it, and just couldn’t get it out of my head. And since I regularly read the Volksblatt and have written to them about a number of things, I thought: Just go ahead and write a piece for the Volksblatt about this marrying outside the faith.

I’m not sure what will happen to me, since the Volksblatt has so many thickheaded readers who always try to turn everything around. I’ve also heard of other correspondents who said that they would like to write for the Volksblatt but are afraid someone will write something against them, and they would really hate that. But I think that would just be pride, those correspondents don’t want to suffer anything, and for that reason they don’t lay their cards on the table. But I have now decided to take the plunge; whatever happens, happens. They can’t kill me, otherwise the law will get them. I’ll just [go ahead and do it], and if I get attacked and can no longer defend myself, I’ll just shut my mouth and be quiet.

I thought I’d write about marrying outside the faith. I just can’t believe that that is quite right. I once read a thick book that some guy named Büchner wrote, who thought that everyone should, wherever possible, be of one religion. But just look at all this marrying going on in the world. No one thinks about father and mother, friends or acquaintances, and certainly not about religion, when it comes to getting married. Of course, old and young alike think about people who are rich and good-looking. Parents say to their children, “Those ones are rich, and I think they’re smart, too, and know how to make money. I’d marry them if I were you.” And then it matters also if he or she is good-looking. And when all is said and done, they’ve rushed ahead as if they were they the last ones in the world, and God and religion get left behind. It would be no surprise if the ministers would try to knock some sense into the heads of both young and old about this dumb marriage stuff. Why can’t a Mennonite boy marry a Mennonite girl? The Reformed a Reformed girl? The Lutheran a Lutheran girl? And so on. That would then look better if they went together to church. But now listen here, you preachers, some of your young people don’t even want to follow you. And now you no longer want to say much about it, and the longer things go on, the worse they get. I don’t doubt that you would prefer to see your young people marry within the church, but this intermarrying has been going on for so long now that there would be a terrible revolution if someone wanted to stop it. And yet, this whole thing is pointless. For it doesn’t matter, if the husband or wife is the least bit strongly committed to their particular church, there will often be discord in the home, and the husband is soon telling the children: you shouldn’t join a church at least until you’re married, then you can become whatever you want. And that’s how it often starts. Yes, sometimes on Sundays the husband goes up the hill to his church and the wife down into the valley to hers; that doesn’t look like being of one flesh, as my old book says. How can one half a body go up the hill and the other down at the same time? And then the children stay home and run around in the dirt until their parents come home and scold them, and then the sermon isn’t worth three cents. I may be ignorant, but to me that all seems backward. Before long, husband and wife both stay away from church at home or head off on Sundays somewhere, one here, the other there, and the whole family is lost to the church. This is how the devil catches them. If both parents were with the same church and would support one another together to go to one church and lead their children by the hand, that would certainly look better.

I have also seen it happen where some young people stay in limbo and don’t join a church until they find someone from somewhere else that they like, and if they get married, then it gets just as mixed-up as before. It would be fine if they were convicted that a different church had proper doctrines, but I think that often a husband or wife goes to a church just to please the other, without thinking about doctrine, since they think that one church is as good as the other. Well, it may be so, if they understood doctrine properly, but I think, when all is said and done, they wouldn’t leave the faith, it wouldn’t be necessary, for like my old book says, what does not come from faith is sin. Romans 14:23.

Now, when I look around, I don’t find this nonsense any greater than right here among us Mennonites, not everywhere, but in many places, and this has been the case as long as I can recall. The elders often used to, and still do in many places, throw someone out of the church if that person married outside the faith. But that didn’t do much good. Many of those young people never ended up joining the church and stayed in limbo their entire lives. They may be called Mennonites, but they’re nothing and don’t belong to any church. Others join the church just when they want to marry, and in my opinion, that’s nothing either.

In other places they gave up this throwing someone out when that person married outside the faith, and that doesn’t much good either, since that person would often go with his or her spouse to the other church along with their children. Now, the source of this problem is, in my opinion, that we do not allow non-members of our church to come with their spouse to communion, since we think that the husband and wife should each go to his or her own church for communion. This tears our membership apart, because a husband and wife like to go to communion together. I just don’t understand why that is that we bring a man and a woman together, but then, when they have become one flesh in marriage and they go to communion, we set them apart from each other. In my opinion, if we marry people, we should let them come to communion together, as long as we can’t say anything else bad about them. As for those who are not joined in marriage, that’s something different, I think. But I believe that those who are married should be completely married or not at all.

Now, you printers should print my piece in your newspaper just as it is. Someone who doesn’t like it may write against it, but shouldn’t go behind my back and talk about it. Don’t print my name until I say so and in the meantime just call me a … Pennsylvanian.